You need to be conscious of yourbody language. It's advice you've heard time and time again. But, in most cases, you're warned that your nonverbal cues could be making you look unconfident. Shuffling feet, slouching, and small gestures — they're all evidence of a lack of self-assuredness that you do your best to avoid.
注意你的肢體語言。這是你一次次聽過的建議。但，大部分情況下，你得到的都是這樣的警示,即：你的肢體暗示讓你看上去不夠自信。腳動來動去，沒精打采的以及一些小的動作都成了你想極力避免掉的，顯現(xiàn)自己缺乏自信的證據(jù)。
But what about the exact opposite? Are there any body language habits that could be making you look arrogant? Yes, there definitely are certain movements and mannerisms that can make you look cocky and big-headed. Avoid these common ones, and you're sure to send the right message.
可反過來的情況你有想過嗎?有沒有一些肢體習(xí)慣讓人看上去很傲慢呢?是的，確有一些行為讓人看上去自大、傲慢。趕緊改掉這些常見的壞毛病吧，您一定能發(fā)出恰當(dāng)?shù)男畔ⅰ?br /> 1. Avoiding eye contact
1.避開目光接觸
"But wait!" you're likely thinking now, "I thought lack of eye contact was one of those things that could make me look unconfident." And that's true. But, depending on your demeanor, avoiding direct eye contact with people can also serve to make you look incredibly arrogant. Why? Well, to put it simply, it makes it look as though you're unwilling (and perhaps even too good) to actually engage in the conversation. Whether you're scanning the room for a better opportunity or repeatedly glancing down at your phone, it can easily make your conversational partner feel unworthy of your time and full attention.
不過，先等下!”你可能會想，“我原以為不正視別人會讓自己看上去不自信。”是，確實是這樣。但這還得看你的行為方式，避免直接與人眼神交流還可以讓你看起來非常傲慢。為什么呢?好吧，就簡單的說吧，因為那樣會讓你看上去不愿意(甚至感覺不真實)認(rèn)真參與談話。不管你是在掃描周圍以找到一個更好的契機，還是不停瞥手機，都很容易讓對方產(chǎn)生不值得讓你給予時間和注意力的感覺。
2. Crossing your arms
2.交叉雙臂
We all know that this isn't necessarily the most approachable posture. Even if it's subconscious, this stance closes you off from others. It makes you look inaccessible and perhaps even a little angry. You don't want to send the message that you're uninterested or too good to be there. So open up your posture. It instantly makes you appear friendlier and more willing to engage in conversations.
我們都知道這絕不是什么平易近人的姿勢。哪怕它是潛意識的，這種姿勢都會讓你遭到排斥。因為它會使你看上去難以接近，甚至有點生氣的感覺。你其實并不想給人以那樣的信息，就是看上去漠不關(guān)心，沒興趣或者很虛偽的樣子。所以請打開你的姿勢。那樣會瞬間讓你變得更友好或者比之前更愿意融入談話中。
3. Holding your chin too high
3.下巴抬太高
This is another one of those times when you need to walk a fine line. To appear confident, you want to hold your chin up. But, take it too far, and suddenly you seem condescending. People do not like to feel that someone is literally looking down at them when speaking. So make sure to strike a balance here. Focus on keeping your head level. That way, you won't run the risk of muttering to the floor, but you also won't take this confidence booster to the extreme.
這是另一個需要你小心的地方。為了看上去自信，你往往就會抬高下巴，但其實是做過了頭，因為那樣的話，你看上去立馬會讓人感覺高人一等。人們可不喜歡在談話的時候感覺被對方輕視。因此這里一定要注意調(diào)衡。注意你頭的高度。那樣，你既不會冒著對地板講話的風(fēng)險，更不會看上去過于自信以至于讓人反感。
4. Pointing your finger
4.拿手指別人
Remember when you were younger and your mom would lecture you to not point? There's a good reason — it can easily come off as a rude and aggressive gesture. Unfortunately, it's a trap that's a bit too easy to fall into. Whether you're waving your finger around in a heated discussion or simply trying to direct someone to the appropriate place, pointing often feels natural. But, if you want to stick to the safe side, do your best to avoid it and gesture with an open hand instead. It achieves the same result, without being quite so combative.
還記得小時候媽媽教導(dǎo)你不要拿手指別人嗎?那是很有道理的，因為那樣的姿勢表現(xiàn)得很粗魯，也很有攻擊性。不幸的是，那確是一個太容易讓人掉進去的陷阱。不管你是在一個熱烈討論的場合揮舞你的手指，還是只是簡單地給人指路，“指”這個行為似乎看上去是如此地正常、自然。但如果你想保險一點的話，就請盡量避免這樣的姿勢。你可以直接用手啊。用整個手既可以達到一樣的效果又不至于看上去對別人不敬。
5. Checking your watch
5.看手表
This one should be obvious. However, if you've ever been engaged in a conversation with someone who continues to not-so-subtly glance at his wrist (or the time on his phone), you know that far too many people do this very thing. Of course, this gesture immediately portrays a high level of boredom--as if you're checking the time to see how soon you can escape. It's another one of those habits that make you appear to think that you're too important to be there. So do your best to avoid it.
這一點應(yīng)該是顯而易見的。如果你曾與那樣的人有過談話，就是不斷看手表(或手機上的時間)，看時間的動作又不敏銳或者說又不巧妙，你會發(fā)現(xiàn)，有很多人還是會做這樣的行為。當(dāng)然，這種姿勢立馬能表現(xiàn)出你感到非常無聊。就好像你正在看時間，看還有多久能結(jié)束并離開。這是另外一種讓你看上去自以為了不起，自大的習(xí)慣。因此請盡量避免。
6. Sighing
6.嘆氣
Yes, letting out a deep sigh can feel good every now and then — but that doesn't mean you want to do it while someone else is speaking.
While you might not necessarily consider it body language, it's still a nonverbal cue that can send a pretty strong message. Most people equate sighing with being uninterested, exasperated, or judgmental about what's being said. Even if that wasn't your intention, a heavy sigh will almost always be taken the wrong way.
是的，時不時地嘆氣感覺還是很好的，但這并不意味著在別人講話的時候，你還想要那么做。即使你并沒有把嘆息當(dāng)成什么肢體語言，它卻是一種非語言類暗示，且能夠發(fā)出強烈的信息。大部分人會把嘆息和不感興趣，惱怒或者對別人所說的東西武斷評價等同起來。盡管你不是有意而為，深深的嘆息總會被人誤解。
7. Forgetting about your facial expressions
7.忘記你的表情
A completely deadpan face can cause you to look unconfident and unengaged, so you want to make sure to be expressive. But you also need to be careful about what expressions you use. An obvious eye roll, a raised eyebrow, or pursed lips can all make your conversational partner feel uneasy and self-conscious. You're better off keeping your facial expressions as neutral (and polite!) as possible.
一張完全面無表情的臉會讓你看上去不自信且心不在焉的樣子，于是你就想著要表情豐富一點。但關(guān)于表情的使用還是要小心為妙。一個明顯的翻白眼，揚揚眉，或者撅撅嘴都能讓對方感覺不安和不自在。你最好讓你的表情更適中(和禮貌!)
Much of the advice you hear about body language advises ways to tweak your mannerisms to appear more confident. But you don't want to swing so far in that direction that you come off as cocky. Stay away from these seven common habits, and you'll avoid falling into that arrogance trap.
你所聽到的關(guān)于肢體語言的建議基本都是提倡調(diào)整姿勢，以示更加自信。但你并不想改變過頭以至于看上去變得自大。所以遠離這七個常見的小習(xí)慣，就不會落入傲慢的陷阱了。